When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Initially of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Basic issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas this can be a sobering name to motion, there is no such thing as a denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. In the present day we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re fascinated with a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however in case you’re any form of an everyday drinker (which means three or 4 nights every week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other manner. In case you’re not consuming throughout the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for no less than 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely isn’t doable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel whenever you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It often takes a number of weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually relies on what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see in case you might make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or have been you in search of actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In case you spend plenty of time bargaining with your self every time alcohol is concerned, which ends up in plenty of “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly need to take a step again.

You won’t even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply turn out to be a part of your interior chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No arduous alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on every week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming have been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that have been continually shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down day by day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I would not have an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions ought to be explored when fascinated with alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and lifelike, mannequin to make use of relating to speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t have to hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you possibly can discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In case you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested in your self, and take the time to reply actually. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our buddies have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you could have ideas/suggestions for the best way to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming buddies? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to search out new buddies – haha. However, critically, if your pals actually respect and help you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to start out consuming once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You might want to work out for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your good friend group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most primary sober particular person round – and I’m proud of consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing just a little extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on hearth! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In case you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam